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I’m a psychologist who studies couples—5 things people in the happiest relationships do on weekends

If you work full-time, you already know how much time and effort it takes to master work-life balance. Add to that a relationship, and it becomes even harder.

As a psychologist who studies couples — and who has a working wife — I’ve faced these challenges firsthand. Thankfully, my job as both a researcher and husband has taught me how important it is to be intentional about how my wife and I spend our time, specifically on weekends.

Here’s how people in the happiest, most successful relationships spend their free time:

1. They put their phones away

A couple who spends a lot of time together, but is constantly distracted by texts, emails or social media, probably isn’t as happy as a couple who spends less time together, but without their phones.

That’s why carving out one-on-one time without any interference from technology is so important. And how you spend that time is actually irrelevant. It doesn’t need to be extravagant or planned down to the minute. What matters is presence.

It could be a quiet morning coffee where you exchange unfiltered thoughts, a slow walk to fill the silence, or a good old wining-and-dining — as long as the phones and laptops are put away.

2. They engage in ‘parallel play’

After a draining week of work, it’s normal and even healthy to crave solitude. But it can be hard to choose between “me time” and “we time.”

Luckily, there’s a way to satiate the need for both alone time and bonding simultaneously. “Parallel play,” a concept derived from child psychology, is when two people engage in their preferred activity separately, but alongside each other.

For couples, this might look like one partner reading on the couch, while the other plays their favorite video game next to them. They might not be engaging directly with one another, but they’re still intentionally sharing space and de-stressing with an activity they each enjoy.

It’s basically a way of saying: “I love you, but I also need to love me for an hour or two. Let’s do it together.” 

3. They create a ritual

Relationships thrive on ritual. Coming home to your partner and knowing that the weekend will bring something familiar — something reliably yours — can be comforting.

In fact, research shows that rituals can help couples organize their lives in a way that allows for both change and stability to coexist. Individuals can merge into a shared identity that feels distinct from either person alone. You can ground yourselves together, no matter what chaos surrounds you.

What those rituals look like is completely up to you. Don’t shy away from cheesy. It could be Sunday morning pancakes, or board game night with a goofy scoreboard on the fridge. If you’re more practical, maybe it’s a weekly sit-down over a glass of wine to plan out the week, or tackling one nagging chore together with your shared playlist in the background. 

4. They put sex on the schedule

Studies show that couples who have a satisfying sex life are more likely to be happier in their relationships.

But with endless chores and errands, weekends can start to feel like a second workweek — with little time left over for intimacy. Sex quickly starts to feel like less of a priority.

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That’s why structured intimacy can be a good thing. Many people think it can diminish spontaneity, but if anything, it actually removes the mental fatigue of trying to make intimacy happen.

It’s also a great way for couples to engage without distraction, all while combating the emotional strain of work. So, make it intentional and set a time.

5. They laugh on purpose

Playfulness, according to research, is one of the most reliable tools couples can use to strengthen their relationship. It can boost relationship satisfaction, ease conflict and break up the sense of monotony that partners can start to resent. 

During the week, we unknowingly train ourselves to look for things to stress over. But on weekends, we need to take those goggles off. The act of being silly — and being met with silliness in return — helps us reconnect with the childlike wonder we carry inside that gets buried beneath our responsibilities. 

So, look for joy on purpose. Maybe you pull out a trivia game with nonsense rules or challenge each other to a dance battle.

There’s no right or wrong way to be playful, and chances are, you already know how to make your partner laugh. You just have to remember to do it.

Mark Travers, PhD, is a psychologist who specializes in relationships. He holds degrees from Cornell University and the University of Colorado Boulder. He is the lead psychologist at Awake Therapy, a telehealth company that provides online psychotherapy, counseling and coaching. He is also the curator of the popular mental health and wellness website, Therapytips.org.

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I’ve studied over 200 kids—there’s a new parenting style that ‘works better than the rest’

There are endless ways to approach parenting. Many parents choose “authoritative parenting,” a widely respected style that balances firm boundaries with nurture and support. Others lean into “authoritarian parenting,” a stricter model that emphasizes rules and consequences.

More recently, I’ve seen lots of “gentle parenting,” which prioritizes empathy and emotional validation.

But what if raising successful kids isn’t about being strict or soft? What if the answer is to create a safe place? After years of studying over 200 parent-child relationships, and from practicing healthy habits with my own child, I’ve seen firsthand what helps kids thrive … and what quietly shuts them down.

That’s why I’ve developed a new parenting framework — one that I believe works better than the rest — rooted in what kids need most but rarely receive: emotional safety.

What is ‘emotionally safe parenting?’

With emotionally safe parenting, the goal is to be deeply attuned to your child’s emotional needs. I teach parents not just how to manage their children’s behaviors, but also to help them build emotional resilience, trust and connection through open and honest conversations.

Like authoritative parenting, emotionally safe parenting sets clear boundaries and encourages independence. What’s different is that it encourages parents to focus on emotional attunement, self-awareness and inner healing.

Some common traits of emotionally safe parents:

  • They accept their child’s emotions without rushing to fix or dismiss them.
  • They respond without shaming their child — avoiding phrases that belittle, guilt or embarrass — even if those were the responses they grew up with.
  • They view “bad” behavior (i.e., screaming, yelling back, hitting another sibling) as stress signals, not defiance.
  • They take responsibility after conflicts by apologizing and reconnecting, rather than punishing or withdrawing.
  • They do the internal work — through journaling, therapy, or mindfulness — not to stay calm in the moment, but to become less reactive in the first place.
  • They create an environment where their child feels safe expressing big emotions, asking questions and showing up as their full, authentic self.
  • They embrace the whole child, showing consistent acceptance of both easy and difficult traits, not just the “well-behaved” version.
  • They lead with calm, steady authority — holding boundaries without fear, while welcoming even the biggest emotions with compassion and clarity.

How do you practice emotionally safe parenting?

Emotional safety is the missing piece in so many homes — not because parents don’t care, but because most were never taught how to create a steady, safe place during emotional storms.

Here’s how to practice emotionally safe parenting:

1. Do the inner work first

Emotionally safe parenting begins with the adult, not the child. Get into the habit of reflecting on how your own childhood and emotional triggers shape their reactions today.

  • When you’re in the heat of the moment, bring awareness to what you’re feeling — not to control it, but to understand it.
  • Before correcting your child, ask yourself: “What part of me feels threatened right now?”
  • If you notice yourself repeating something your parents said, consider: “Is this how I want to show up for my child?”

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2. See behavior as a signal, not a threat

Instead of viewing misbehavior as disrespect, emotionally safe parents see it as communication — a request for support, not punishment.

  • If a child slams a door, see it as “they might feel overwhelmed,” rather than “they’re being rude.”
  • Ask, “What is their behavior trying to tell me?” instead of, “How do I stop this?”
  • Respond with curiosity instead of jumping to consequences, asking things like, “Can you help me understand what happened?” or, “What were you feeling when that happened?”

3. Set boundaries with empathy, not control

Limits are necessary, but you don’t need to set them with fear or shame. Emotionally safe parents hold firm boundaries while staying emotionally connected.

They might say things like:

  • To stay consistent while still offering empathy: “I understand you’re upset, but the answer is still no.”
  • To offer support, not just corrections: “This is hard. I’m here to help you figure it out.”
  • To validate feelings without changing the limit: “You’re frustrated this isn’t going your way.”

 4. Prevent shame from taking place

Emotionally safe parenting isn’t about being perfect — it’s about modeling what healthy repair looks like. Instead of blaming or withdrawing, reconnect after hard moments and show your child that conflict doesn’t have to lead to shame or disconnection.

This could look like:

  • Owning your part and not blaming your child for their reaction: “I shouldn’t have yelled. That wasn’t okay, and I’m sorry.”
  • Validating feelings even during correction: “It’s okay to feel angry, but we need to find a safer way to show it than hitting.”
  • Restoring connection before problem-solving: “Let’s take a few deep breaths together, then we can talk about what happened.”

In emotionally safe parenting, communication is everything

The way you speak to your child becomes how they speak to themselves. Emotionally safe parents are mindful that their tone, words and reactions shape how their child sees themselves, especially in hard moments.

I always try to use a calm, respectful tone with my child, even when setting limits. And I let him know that his feelings are valid: “It’s okay to be upset,” or, “I’d feel that way, too.” Most importantly, I want him to know that I’ll always be there for him: “Even when things get hard, I’m still here.”

Remember, you want to give your child something deeper than discipline: the sense that they are safe, supported and unconditionally loved. I always tell parents that the child who feels emotionally safe grows up to be the adult who can regulate their emotions, build healthy relationships, trust themselves and live with confidence.

Reem Raouda is a leading voice in conscious parenting and the creator of FOUNDATIONS — the transformative healing journal for parents ready to break cycles, do the inner work, and become the emotionally safe parent their child needs. She is widely recognized for her groundbreaking work in children’s emotional safety and strengthening the parent-child bond. Follow her on Instagram.

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I’m a Harvard-trained pediatrician: The No. 1 healthy food parents don’t feed their kids enough of

As a pediatrician, I spend a lot of time engaging with families about nutrition. My philosophy is simple: If you empower a child to embrace healthy eating habits early on, they are more likely to carry these positive behaviors into adulthood. 

Early intervention can be transformative and help substantially reduce their long-term risk of developing chronic conditions such as diabetes, heart disease and even certain types of cancer.

Many parents already know the importance of feeding kids vegetables and limiting added sugar. We often discuss “eating the rainbow,” emphasizing the need for a diverse range of colorful fruits and vegetables. Parents frequently prioritize dark leafy greens, antioxidant-rich blueberries and healthy-fat-packed avocados. 

However, there’s one nutritional powerhouse that often gets overlooked: beans. Here’s why I wish more parents fed this underrated superfood to their kids. 

1. They contain protein that is crucial for growth and energy 

Beans, in all their varied forms, are an exceptional source of plant-based protein. Many bean varieties contain all the essential amino acids that are vital for supporting a child’s energy, growth and active lifestyle. 

Beans are also loaded with both soluble and insoluble fiber, a duo that’s a game-changer for digestive health. Insoluble fiber promotes regular bowel movements, preventing constipation and keeping things moving smoothly. Soluble fiber contributes to that feeling of fullness and satiety after a meal, which can be helpful in managing appetite and preventing overeating. 

Soluble fiber also plays a role in lowering LDL, or “bad” cholesterol levels, and helps to stabilize blood sugar fluctuations after meals, preventing those dreaded energy crashes.

2. They are filled with essential nutrients and vitamins 

Beans are naturally fortified with an impressive array of essential vitamins and minerals. 

They are also a fantastic source of folate, which is vital for cell growth and development, as well as iron, which is crucial for carrying oxygen throughout the body. 

Plus, they’re packed with magnesium for nerve and muscle function, and a range of B vitamins that support energy production and brain health.

Soybeans in particular have a good amount of healthy fats in them, like omega 3 and omega 6 fats that support heart and brain health. 

3. They are sustainable and affordable 

Beyond their nutritional profile, beans offer practical advantages. They are very affordable, making them accessible to families on any budget. Their long shelf life means you can stock up and always have a healthy meal option on hand. 

Additionally, incorporating beans into our diets is an environmentally-friendly choice. They have a lower carbon footprint compared to many animal protein sources, contributing to a more sustainable food system.

4. They are versatile and appealing even to the pickiest eaters 

Of course, all the nutritional knowledge in the world won’t make a difference if kids refuse to eat what’s offered. This is where the magic of beans truly shines. 

I’ve found that many children genuinely enjoy the taste and texture of beans, and they are remarkably easy to prepare in various kid-friendly ways.

For younger children or more picky eaters, start with something simple and approachable, like steaming edamame (young soybeans) or adding black beans to a cheesy quesadilla. I’ve even found success with black bean-based brownies, a surprisingly delicious and nutritious treat. 

For more adventurous eaters, consider introducing lentil soups, flavorful bean chili or stews. The versatility of beans makes them easy to incorporate into a wide range of dishes, ensuring there’s a bean recipe out there for everyone.

Dr. Kelly Fradin is the Chair of Pediatrics at the Atria Health and Research Institute and the mother of two children. She is the author of ”Advanced Parenting: Advice for Helping Kids through Diagnoses, Differences and Mental Health Challenges.” To learn more, you can find Dr. Fradin on Instagram @adviceigivemyfriends.

Want to boost your confidence, income and career success? Take one (or more!) of Smarter by CNBC Make It’s expert-led online courses, which aim to teach you the critical skills you need to succeed that you didn’t learn in school. Topics include earning passive income onlinemastering communication and public speaking skillsacing your job interview, and practical strategies to grow your wealth. Use coupon code MEMORIAL to purchase any course at a discount of 30% off the regular course price (plus tax). Offer valid from 12:00 am Eastern Time (“ET”) on May 19, 2025, through 11:59 pm ET on June 2, 2025. Terms and restrictions apply.

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33-year-old in Florida making $78,000 a year has racked up over 1 million credit card points

David Do doesn’t have much of a system when it comes to his credit cards.

Sure, he keeps them organized. When he’s not using them, his 30 or so active cards live in a binder in plastic sheaths like Pokémon cards. He has the commensurate apps for all of them, too, which helps him keep track of his spending and due dates. But that’s about the extent of it.

“For people who do travel hacking, like what I do, they have the proper way of using an Excel sheet. I don’t use an Excel sheet at all,” says Do, 33. “Truthfully, I just go by memory and just be like, ‘Oh, yeah, I did apply for this card last year. So let me just keep a timeline of when the annual fee is due, or when this credit card statement is due.’”

Travel hacking means strategically using credit card rewards programs to score free or discounted flights and hotel stays, often by taking advantage of bonuses for opening new cards or transferring points between programs. It’s a hobby that requires vigilance – both to ensure that you snag the best deals when they arise and to make sure you don’t accidentally rack up debt across your array of cards.

It’s easy to see why some travel hackers are serious about their spreadsheets. It’s hard to argue with Do’s results, however. Besides a mortgage on a 2-bedroom, 2-bathroom townhouse in Riviera Beach, Florida, he doesn’t carry any debt. He dutifully invests a healthy portion of the $78,000 salary he earns working remotely as a social worker for a group of primary physicians’ offices.

Since 2017, he’s earned and redeemed well over 1 million credit card points and miles, using them to help fund trips to 33 countries.

“I’m hoping to do 35 by the time I’m 35,” he says.

‘[My parents] always lived below their means’

Do owes a good deal of his financial success to his family, in more ways than one. He learned a lot from his parents, refugees from Vietnam who he says were loving providers and yet careful about how they spent.

“My parents were always very, very frugal with things. They we were strict about eating out, things to buy. If we wanted something, they were always like, ‘We can’t afford that right now,’” he says. “I think in the grand scheme of things, they were being smart with their money … they always lived below their means.”

They kept on top of Do when it came to schoolwork, too, which paid off. Thanks to a mix of scholarships and grants, he was able to graduate from University of Central Florida in 2015 with a degree in psychology and just $10,000 in student debt.

Moving back home, ‘I could prioritize’ getting out of debt

“Towards the end of my undergrad, my brother had passed away, and I didn’t really, you know, have a solid idea of what wanted to do with my [life],” he says. “So as soon as I could graduate, I immediately went home.”

Living with his parents in West Palm Beach allowed Do to support them emotionally while giving himself time to figure things out, professionally and financially.

After he started working as a coordinator at a treatment center for adults and children with mental health and substance abuse issues, he realized he was interested in social work. He enrolled at Barry University in Miami in 2017 and graduated two years later with a master’s and about $40,000 in additional student loan debt.

Do embarked on an aggressive strategy of repaying his loans and bolstering his savings. “Living at home made it a lot easier, because I could prioritize certain things I needed to,” he says. “So I pretty much budgeted maybe over half of my paychecks [toward] all the student loans.”

He made his last payment in early 2020. The following year, Do bought his current home, a $182,000 townhouse, with a 3% down payment.

How he spends his money

Here’s how Do spent his money in March 2025.

  • Housing and utilities: $1,875 on his mortgage, private mortgage insurance, homeowner’s association fees, water and electricity
  • Dining and groceries: $962
  • Savings and investments: $950 invested in his 401(k)
  • Discretionary: $874 on entertainment and tax preparation
  • Insurance: $294 on health, dental, accident, auto and accident policies
  • Travel: $184 on plane and train tickets
  • Transportation: $156 on parking, tolls and ridesharing
  • Health: $111 on prescriptions, copays and his mom’s monthly health insurance premium
  • Phone: $71
  • Subscriptions and memberships: $17 on Planet Fitness and iCloud

Do’s living expenses make up the biggest chunk of his budget, though he’s quick to acknowledge that he got a pretty good deal. “Fortunately, I was able to buy at a time where the interest rate was relatively low, so, that kind of helped a bit,” he says. “I do have HOA fees. That’s a little bit hefty, but it’s still a pretty decent value for what it is in South Florida.”

Do’s mortgage rate is just a tick over 3%. Even with a $503 HOA fee, his monthly housing payment comes to just over $1,700. Utilities run him an additional $156.

His next biggest expense in March was food. The majority of that came from dining out, though Do says he’s working on getting handier in the kitchen.

Do uses credit cards to his advantage. Every cent he spent at a restaurant in March, for example, went on a Discover card offering 5% cash back that month on dining purchases. Plane and train tickets went on a travel card from Capital One. Amazon purchases went on a Chase Amazon Prime card.

Each month, Do examines which of his cards offer the most generous rewards and divvies his spending accordingly. “It really just depends on what month it is, because each credit card’s points have … you get extra cash back on the category, like, let’s say, for example, groceries or gas,” he says.

And he signs up for new rewards cards when doing so is likely to benefit him. “I know if I have a big expense coming up, let’s say, for example, I have to pay for tuition, or I have to pay for car insurance, or I have a big quarterly tax I need to pay, then I’ll try to time it accordingly with one of the credit cards that offers a big sign-up bonus,” Do says.

Balancing saving with ‘a fulfilling life’

Do is happy to redeem the points he racks up — he estimates he takes seven or eight trips a year — though he looks to get bang for his buck. Like most travel hackers, he looks to maximize his points’ value by transferring them between loyalty partners, which can offer bonuses.

While Do currently has about 370,000 points saved, you won’t see him flying in first class anytime soon. “It’s always been economy for me. I could redeem it for business, but it just, I can’t really sacrifice the points,” he says. “I’m more of a budget traveler.”

His next trip? “Right now, me and my friend, we’re hoping to plan a trip to believe it or not, Uzbekistan, Azerbaijan and Georgia,” he says. “So that’s kind of being in the works right now.”

Over the longer term, Do plans on achieve a version of financial independence known as “Coast FIRE.” Once he’s saved a certain amount, the thinking goes, he can let that money grow until he reaches full retirement age while he scales back the amount he works, perhaps even by going part-time.

Currently, he has about $250,000 saved across workplace and personal retirement accounts, taxable brokerage accounts, health savings accounts and cash accounts. Between savings and investment gains, he hopes to push that number over $1 million, even if it’s not what he necessarily needs to “coast.”

“My goal right now is to contribute as much as I can to retirement, but also trying to live a fulfilling life,” he says. “And with my job being flexible, I think it’s giving me that opportunity, too.”

What’s your budget breakdown? Share your story with us for a chance to be featured in a future installment.

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50-year-old whose side hustle brings in $455K/year: Anyone can do this ‘if you have the motivation’

This story is part of CNBC Make It’s Six-Figure Side Hustle series, where people with lucrative side hustles break down the routines and habits they’ve used to make money on top of their full-time jobs. Got a story to tell? Let us know! Email us at AskMakeIt@cnbc.com.

In 2018, Josh White went to Home Depot on a mission.

He was teaching his 12-year-old daughter how to replace splintering wooden panels on their deck in Passaic, New Jersey, and wanted a smaller hammer to fit her hands. Aisle after aisle, he couldn’t find any functional, kid-friendly tools, he says.

White, who owns a Boca Raton, Florida-based creative agency called OffWhite Co., decided to sketch and 3D-print his own models. He designed a bird-shaped tape measure — with marked ribbon for a tongue and a droopy googly eye as a level — got prototypes from a factory in China, and listed the product on Amazon under the name Handy Famm in December 2019.

As customer interest grew, White and his Handy Famm team — now four full-time workers, some of whom came over from OffWhite — designed more tot-centric tools, like giraffe hammers and hippo wrenches, he says. Handy Famm brought in $455,000 in sales last year, according to documents reviewed by CNBC Make It.

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Handy Famm, which sells online and in hardware stores — including Home Depot — is on track to reach profitability this year, White projects. It’s grown enough that it may no longer qualify as a side hustle: White spends at least 40 hours per week growing and marketing it, he says.

He started taking a salary from the company earlier this year, though his OffWhite salary still makes up a majority of his income, he says.

Notably, White had an advantage in getting Handy Famm off the ground: After designing for companies like Chobani, Cabbage Patch Kids and AeroPress, he already owned equipment to help him model his ideas. He had relationships with manufacturers in China, and more than two decades of experience using art and products to tell stories, he says.

Still, anyone can create a successful side hustle with the right “motivation,” he says.

Here, White discusses the shortcuts he took to build Handy Famm quickly, cost-cutting strategies and how to learn from your mistakes.

CNBC Make It: Do you think your side hustle is replicable?

White: Yes, but the way I’m doing it, not so much.

There aren’t a lot of people who have the experiences that I’ve gone through in life. Before Handy Famm, I traveled the world and worked with manufacturers on how to make stuff for people, anything from headphones to a Barbie doll. I have the network, I have the connections and I know my way around these areas.

You can go on Alibaba and find a manufacturer there and just hope for the best. But most people have to spend two years in development and negotiation and thousands of dollars prototyping their products with factories in China. I was able to build Handy Famm so fast because I skipped all the steps and went to the sources.

But in terms of identifying [a gap or need] in the market, then figuring out how to make something, I think anyone can do anything — if you have the motivation to do it.

Are there shortcuts new entrepreneurs can use, even without the type of prior experience you had?

I learned early on that you can’t rely on the factory to help you do the creative. You want to keep that part as close to your chest as possible.

The more vision you have, the more research you do upfront, the more time it’ll save you going back and forth. If you just hand over a sketch of an idea, you’re going to get disappointed very fast.

One of my first projects at OffWhite, I designed this airplane-shaped object holder [that] people could put their knickknacks in. I sent my design to a factory, and it came back as a gray pancake.

So, I went ahead and started to build my own model out of clay. You can hire people to help you with the design part too, as long as you have a clear vision — a North Star of what you’re trying to accomplish.

Doing your creative homework upfront seems to contradict some popular Silicon Valley advice, like “launch a minimum viable product” or “move fast and break things.” What’s the merit of slowing down?

The timeframe of “just do it” is fungible [project to project]. Be as smart and educated as you can upfront, but at some point, you have to take the risk. If you want to get something to market, you can’t wait until something’s perfect either, because then you’ll never do anything.

Everything has a different learning curve. When we first launched our first tape measure, parents told us their kids were getting too excited and ripping out the ribbon out of the bird head, so we had to go back in and figure out a way to make it stronger. Before we launched the hammer, the [prototype’s] head was too heavy to be kid-friendly and functional. Even with all my experience, I had to gut it and put it back together.

I think the key point here is: Don’t get frustrated. There are always going to be micro-failures, things that go wrong no matter how much research you do. I call [mistakes] my Harvard education because, often, you have to pay your way in time and expenses [to succeed].

But I’ve learned for the next time, and I get smarter.

This interview has been edited for length and clarity.

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