Sometimes, 24 hours just doesn’t feel like enough. Between work, commutes, and a growing to-do list, it’s easy to get through an entire weekday without really connecting with your partner. But staying close doesn’t require extra time — just intention.

As a psychologist who studies couples (and as a husband), I’ve seen firsthand how small daily rituals can help people feel more connected, especially when life is busy. Even better news: Intimacy isn’t something that has to wait until the weekend.

Here’s what people in the happiest relationship do during the weekdays — that most neglect.

Most mornings are rushed and chaotic: alarms, deadlines, and the hurry to get out the door. That means the only real moment spent together is waking up in the same bed, and maybe a distracted kiss before they go their separate ways.

But happy couples find small ways to start the day together, even if it’s just for five or 10 minutes. That might mean setting the alarm a little earlier to cuddle before getting out of bed, making the bed together while chatting about your dreams, or sitting side-by-side for your morning coffee — even in silence.

The point isn’t how you do it, but that you actually do it. The best couples remind each other: “Regardless of how cruddy the day ahead might be, we’ve still got each other.”

You don’t need long, drawn-out conversations during the workday to stay connected. A funny meme, a little anecdote about your daily office drama, or a quick “thinking of you” message can be enough to strengthen emotional intimacy.

The happiest couples check in — not to talk logistics, but to remind each other they’re top of mind. It takes just a few seconds (during a lunch break, coffee run, or even a quick bathroom trip) to check in with their other half.

These small notes may seem insignificant, but they’re powerful mood-boosters — and a simple way to make your partner feel seen. Not only does this nurture your sense of intimacy in the midst of a hectic day, but it’ll also bless you with a little hit of midday motivation: a reminder of the person waiting for you at home. 

Stress from the workday has a sneaky way of bleeding into time with your partner, whether it’s through email-checking or a snappy tone.

That’s why the happiest couples take a few minutes to unwind alone after the workday ends. Whether it’s a solo walk, a quick workout, or just zoning out with a snack and your favorite TV show, this “me time” helps clear the mental clutter so you can show up more present and patient for your partner.

It might sound counterintuitive, but sometimes the best way to reconnect is to recharge separately first.

Evenings can be dominated by separate routines — one partner cleans up while the other scrolls on their phone, or both crash on opposite ends of the couch.

But the happiest couples intentionally carve out one shared moment every day. No distractions, no multitasking. Maybe it’s sitting down to dinner together, playing a quick game, or watching your favorite trivia show while shouting answers at the screen. Even five minutes of undivided attention can go a long way.

What it looks like doesn’t matter. It only needs to be shared, and fiercely protected. No kids, no chores, no notifications allowed.

These nightly “audits” aren’t meant to solve problems, but they do help you stay emotionally aligned and prevent little issues from becoming bigger ones. It’s just a matter of simple questions and even simpler answers: “How are you, really?” or “Are we okay?”

Some nights, it might be statement-based: all the thank yous, sorries, or little thoughts you may not have had the time to share during the day.

Quick, nightly audits ensure that nothing goes unsaid throughout the week, only to spill out on the weekends. Most importantly, they’re the best way to tend to your connection, without exhausting yourselves in the process.

Mark Travers, PhD, is a psychologist who specializes in relationships. He holds degrees from Cornell University and the University of Colorado Boulder. He is the lead psychologist at Awake Therapy, a telehealth company that provides online psychotherapy, counseling, and coaching. He is also the curator of the popular mental health and wellness website, Therapytips.org.

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Companies are trimming their workforces, and many of them are focusing their cuts on middle management.

The number of managers dropped 6.1% between May 2022 to May 2025, according to research from Live Data Technologies and reported by The Wall Street Journal, while executive-level roles fell 4.6%. Estee Lauder and Match Group recently said they each cut around 20% of their managers, while UPS, Citigroup, Amazon and Google have all worked to shrink their management teams.

Small and midsize businesses are part of the trend, too: Supervisors at these orgs now have an average of six direct reports — twice as many as they did five years ago, according to data from Gusto and reported by Bloomberg.

As a result, a growing share of laid-off managers are fighting for a shrinking pool of opportunities.

“I haven’t been on the job market for two years, so I didn’t realize how tumultuous it is,” says Tiffany Fuentes, 33, in Fort Mohave, Arizona, who was laid off from her job as a head of recruitment in June when her tech company cut 50% of its staff.

Though she did plenty of hiring in her previous role, being on the other side has been a surprise. “I didn’t realize there were so many job seekers with the same degrees [and] employment history that I have, and that it would be this difficult to find employment,” she says.

When she recently wrote on LinkedIn about the challenges of her search, she received messages from people along the lines of, “you’ve only been at this for two weeks; I’ve been at this for a year,” Fuentes says. “It’s really heartbreaking to see so many people in the workforce all at the same time trying to find those jobs.”

Even when she does get through to schedule an interview, the experience hasn’t been good.

She recently agreed to an interview for a job that would be a step back in her career, but the interviewer never showed up to the video call. “For me to get dressed and ready and be on the call really excited with my research,” Fuentes says, “when that person doesn’t show up, it’s a little gut wrenching.” Fuentes says she never heard back from the employer.

Though not ideal, Fuentes has come to the understanding that she may have to “be realistic” and take a lower title and salary in today’s market.

A growing share of today’s job seekers are taking roles with a pay cut, which is highest among managers (22%) and managers transitioning to individual contributor roles (32%), according to Glassdoor data. And middle managers are worried about their job security: Employee confidence for mid-level employees declined 4.5 percentage points from the last year.

Job security concerns are leading some to look for a new job in case they’re suddenly let go.

That’s the case for a a 27-year-old product director for a startup in Chicago, who declined to be named to protect her job security.

She currently has a full-time job but has been actively looking for a new one for two months because she feels underpaid and is concerned about her company’s future. ”[I’m] trying to make sure that I’m not in a position that a lot of people are right now, which sucks, where they’re just laid off and then s— out of luck.”

She says she’s had four direct reports and was a skip-level manager to some 80 people. Working at a startup means her title doesn’t necessarily reflect all the responsibilities she’s taken on over a condensed period of time, though. That makes it hard to transfer her title and experience to other roles, she says.

In a tight hiring market, she says, there’s little chance of her landing an interview when her experience doesn’t match a job description to a T.

For roles she feels would be a next step in her career, the job ads show “you need to have 12 years of experience, and the salary is awesome, but it’s almost like that would be a VP level,” she says, “and the role right underneath that is non-existent.”

Leadership experts say effective middle management can be a powerful tool for businesses to keep employees engaged, satisfied and happy with their work and their employer. Without it, employees can feel disconnected with senior leadership and the mission of their work, which can lead to burnout and attrition.

PR professional Stacey Dillon agrees. Dillon, 47, quit her last managerial job in the beginning of December 2024 and was optimistic about finding a new one when she started looking a month later. She’d previously been heavily recruited to new gigs, and she’d just moved from Salt Lake City to the Phoenix area, where she’d heard there was a booming job market.

Dillon says the difference in her job search today compared with her last role, which she landed in 2021, couldn’t be more different. The last time around, she says she was hired in two weeks. “This time the process has felt longer, more mysterious and ambiguous, and far more competitive.”

“I’ve seen well aligned jobs disappear overnight, even retracted, outsourced or restructured,” she says.

Her experience has been frustrating: She was recruited to apply for a job that had been vacant for six months and completed a five-hour assessment for it. She says she never heard back but sees in the online system that the job is still open and her application is still under consideration.

For another role, Dillon says she was recruited to apply but was ghosted and hasn’t heard back for about two months.

The biggest lesson she’s learned is to focus on the human side of the job search.

“In this job market I’m reminded that career transitions aren’t just logical — they’re emotional— and human connection has become a core part of how I job search,” she says.

As such, she says networking has been crucial to get job leads, referrals and contract work for the time being.

With constant news of middle management layoffs, Dillon thinks businesses are at a turning point: “Middle management is often misunderstood, but it’s essential, not just for operations, but for culture, mentorship and wisdom.”

“Middle managers are so uniquely positioned to humanize leadership, to connect strategy to people,” Dillon says. “I hope organizations will continue to invest in those roles, not just as an administrative necessity, but as the cultural and strategic backbone to teams.”

Companies tend to lay people off during recessions but in recent years have trimmed their workforces even as they report high sales and profits. Ultimately, many bosses are looking to do more with less, and they’re hoping artificial intelligence will help them do that.

Some 41% of employers plan to downsize their workforce by 2030 with the help of AI automation, according to a January World Economic Forum survey.

Bob Friedland is open to tech innovations in the workplace but feels replacing middle managers with AI would be a bad business move.

“When you’re dealing with a CEO, they don’t expect to have to double-check the work; they expect the work to come to them done and ready,” says Friedland, 50, of Little Falls, New Jersey. Junior employees may not have the skillsets to ensure work done with AI is entirely accurate, he says. “So if you remove that middle layer, you’re actually removing an important piece that can act as that gut check.”

As the public relations professional sees it, “Will AI speed us up? Yes. Can it replace certain functions? Yes. Can it replace every middle manager? Probably not.”

Friedland, who’s been job-hunting for two years since his director-level role was cut in a restructuring, is optimistic that businesses are still hiring for middle manager roles. But he also faces a lot of competition from candidates who may not actually be qualified.

In his last role, any post he hired for often saw 1,000 applications, not all of them well suited for the vacancy, as candidates played a “numbers game” and mass applied to openings, Friedland says.

Friedland says he’s intentionally applied to some 750 roles during his search, which shows him “there really are a lot of opportunities.”

“There’s a lot of movement in the industry,” he says. “But it’s just impossible to get seen.”

In the meantime, Friedland started his own consultancy to do freelance work and earn an income. The biggest upside to his job-searching journey is that he uses his time to invest in his network, which has led to a few interviews and landed him clients for his business.

On a personal note, he’s been able to focus on his relationships, home projects and hobbies, “which is not something I’d ever really done before. I was very much a workaholic.”

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At 78 years old, my brain is just as sharp and productive as ever.

I’ve written more than 175 books over the course of my career — on a wide range of topics, including marine biology, job interviews, ancient trees, creativity, baseball, dinosaurs, American history, resume writing, tsunamis, and Mother Goose. I also spent over three decades as a professor and worked with more than 100 schools across North America as a consultant.

Even though I’m retired now, I still write books, give presentations, and blog about psychology. My secret to staying sharp is simple: I am constantly curious.

Our brain’s chemistry changes when we become curious. Curiosity is what sharpens our intellectual powers, and keeps us mentally active well into our golden years. Here are my four hard rules for keeping my brain sharp and quick:

There’s a common belief that knowledge is the key to success. But growing research suggests that some of the most successful people embrace their own “innate ignorance.”

They understand that there is much more to learn about the world, but they don’t let that impede their progress. If anything, it galvanizes them to do more. Knowing what we don’t know can be a powerful mindset shift that sparks growth and creativity.

How to do this: Once or twice a week, select a topic you know little about, preferably one unrelated to your job or background. Maybe it’s WWII fighter pilots, prehistoric cave paintings, or square-trunked trees.

Spend five to 10 minutes learning all you can about that topic. Write down three interesting facts. This is a small but powerful way to exercise your brain.

Many of us get trapped in an endless cycle of convergent thinking, or always looking for the “right” answers.

But I’ve spent my entire career as an educator, and I can tell you that most schools trained us to focus on facts (“What is the capital of Pennsylvania?”), rather than creative answers (“Where do you think the capital Pennsylvania should be located?”).

Divergent questions, or open-ended questions that have multiple answers, encourage deeper thinking and help keep your mind flexible.

How to do this: A few times a week, ask yourself “What if…?” questions:

• What if you could relive any day of your life? What would you do?
• What if one historic event could be reversed? Which one would you select?
• What if you could be perfect in one athletic skill or talent? Which would it be? 

Not only are these questions fun, they can also generate a number of responses and paths for exploration.

According to researchers at the Greater Good Science Center at the University of California, Berkeley, experiencing awe can stimulate wonder and curiosity. 

Some examples can be holding a newborn baby, seeing the Grand Canyon for the first time, or watching a kaleidoscope of butterflies dance over an open field. That sense of awe can improve our well-being, contribute to a more positive attitude, and boost curiosity.

How to do this: Once or twice a month, go to a place you’ve never been before. It doesn’t have to be somewhere far — maybe a local park or new restaurant. Find something awesome, spend time observing, and record your thoughts.

Reading outside our field of expertise may be one of the most significant things we can do to develop our natural curiosity. When we expose ourselves to different ways of thinking through literature, we open up new possibilities for learning.

Even after 50 years of teaching, my current reading list includes books not on education, but on marketing strategies, paleontology, growing tomatoes, British narrowboats, island ecology, long distance running, and redwood trees, among many others.

How to do this: Visit your local public library and pick at least three books on topics that interest you, but that you’ve never formally studied or worked in. Read at least one chapter a day. You might be surprised by where your research takes you.

Anthony D. Fredericks, Ed.D., is professor emeritus of education at York College of Pennsylvania. He is the author of Psychology Today’s Creative Insights blog, and has written over 100 nonfiction books including ”From Fizzle to Sizzle: The Hidden Forces Crushing Your Creativity and How You Can Overcome Them, ”Two-Minute Habits: Small Habits, Dynamic Creativity,” and his latest ”In Search of the Old Ones: An Odyssey among Ancient Trees.″ Follow him on LinkedIn.

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As a journalist, a media executive and a communication coach, I’ve spent my entire career focused on helping people communicate what’s important to them

One thing I’ve noticed: When it comes to empathizing with someone sharing a personal struggle — whether it’s the trials of a troublesome teenager or losing a job — many of us respond by telling a similar experience we had. We assume it shows the other person they’re not alone.

Though it may come with the best intentions, the ‘I’ve been there, too’ approach shifts to focus from them to you. And real empathy isn’t about relating our parallel story — it’s about listening deeply.

Here’s how to be more authentic when showing empathy:

Start by eliminating any distractions. Keep your phone on silent and out of sight. Take a deep breath and let your body language show that you’re focused on the other person. 

Remember that empathy is more than just words — it’s also in how you present yourself. Tune into your body: Are you tense? Or relaxed? Guarded? Or open and warm? 

How you communicate with your body, such as your breath, shoulders and hands, can help the speaker feel more relaxed and know that they’re in a safe space to be vulnerable.

Say your conversation partner spoke about an experience and described it as “really horrible.”

By honing in on that phrasing and reflecting it back to them, you give them the opportunity to reflect on what was so horrible about it, to go deeper and understand themselves more fully.

Instead of sharing advice or something similar you’ve experienced, try summing up the emotional essence of what they shared. For example, you might say something like, “It sounds like you feel frustrated and even angry with your mother for making all these comments about your child rearing?”

By picking up on the emotions, even if they’ve not been directly expressed, your speaker feels like you’re really trying to understand them, and that their feelings and experience matter. 

To make people feel comforted and seen, you don’t always need to respond immediately.

Silence is an underrated way to strengthen your connection with others. It demonstrates that you’re not controlling the conversation and allows for a natural rhythm. 

Even brief pauses of three to 10 seconds can lower heart rate and blood pressure, creating space for more thoughtful reflection. In this quiet, trust grows and deeper understanding emerges.

The most effective conversation partners are curious and readily admit what they do not understand. 

And unlike questions that steer the conversation toward our own interests, saying, “Tell me more,” allows the speaker to decide what matters, and reveal what is most important to them — even if prior to speaking with you, they actually didn’t realize that themselves.

This question can unlock so much, because your openness encourages them to share more authentically. Ultimately this leads to deeper, more meaningful insights and conversation.

So often, listening is transactional. We’re only briefly pantomiming the act of listening, just waiting to jump to explain our own ideas, solutions, the “right” answer — interrupting meaning and destroying thinking. But when you give yourself and your conversation partners the space and care to express yourselves fully, that can transform your relationships.

Emily Kasriel worked at the BBC for over two decades as an award-winning journalist, editor and media executive. She developed the Deep Listening approach as a Senior Visiting Research Fellow at King’s College Policy Institute in London, drawing on her experience as an accredited executive coach and workplace mediator. She is also now a Visiting Scholar at Columbia University.

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This is an adapted excerpt from the book ”Deep Listening: Transform Your Relationships with Family, Friends, and Foes ― Transformational Communication, Listening, and Empathy Through an 8-Step Method″ by Emily Kasriel. Copyright © 2025 by Emily Kasriel. Published with the permission of William Morrow.

At 30 years old, Alesse Lightyear decided it was time to leave New York City and her job in reality TV production.

“I was living check to check, which sucked. My last few years living and working in New York City were some of the most stressful years of my life,” Lightyear tells CNBC Make It. “I was tired of working 70 hours a week for ten years. Being in my 20s, I felt like a 50-year-old woman.”

Lightyear had lived in neighborhoods all across NYC and in Jersey City at one point, too.

“At the height of my career in New York, I was probably making $100,000 a year [and] working eight months out of the year, which on paper sounds great, but New York City is one of the world’s most expensive cities, so that $100,000 went extremely fast,” Lightyear says.

Lightyear took some time to consider where she might land next and decided on China, where should could teach English as a second language. In 2019, she made her official move to Beijing and hasn’t looked back.

Lightyear lived in the capital city for four years before relocating to Chengdu, where she got a job teaching at a university.

After securing her job, Lightyear had just a few days to find an apartment. She looked at six places in 48 hours and settled on a furnished three-bedroom, one-bathroom apartment with a balcony and laundry room. It’s located in downtown Chengdu and only a five-minute walk from the subway.

Some of the benefits and perks of Lightyear’s job include free health insurance, a travel stipend, a flight allowance, two months of paid summer and winter vacation, and a rent stipend.

The rent stipend she receives means Lightyear only has to pay half of her the $556 monthly rent — just $278 a month. To secure the apartment, Lightyear had to pay a security deposit, a broker’s fee, and three months’ rent totaling $2,780. Because her rent stipend didn’t kick in until after she received her first paycheck, Lightyear was responsible for paying that full amount up front.

“The process happens easily. As long as you have the money, you do everything right then and there,” she says.

In China, it’s customary for potential tenants to try to negotiate the rent price, Lightyear says. But when she tried, the landlord wouldn’t budge. Lightyear says she was OK with that because she liked the landlord and the apartment.

“The benefits of this job just make life easy and cheap,” Lightyear says. “The quality of my lifestyle in China is much better than the quality of life I had living in the U.S.”

Unlike in the U.S., most of Lightyear’s utilities are pay-as-you-go versus the usual monthly or quarterly bill. Since she moved into the apartment, she hasn’t had to pay for gas because her landlord loaded more than enough money on the gas card. Her additional expenses include $15 a month on her unlimited cell phone plan, Wi-Fi, and Internet.

Lightyear also pays $50 a month for electricity, an average of $75 a month on groceries and $150 a month on eating out. Since moving to China and supplementing her teaching salary with content creation and an active YouTube channel, Lightyear estimates she’s been able to save $1,000 a month.

With the additional money she’s able to save, Lightyear says she plans on buying a house outside the U.S., as she can’t afford to buy a house back home.

“I haven’t saved enough money to buy a house in the U.S. but I have saved enough money to pay off a lot of my student loans and I think I’ve saved enough money to buy a little casita on the beach in Mexico,” she says. “Fingers crossed that is the plan.”

Lightyear says she’s staying in Chengdu for at least another 18 months, since she recently renewed her lease. Eventually, she’ll return to Michigan while deciding where to settle down next.

Lightyear says she knows she’s ready to leave the country she’s called home for six years, but isn’t quite sure which country will give her the same thrill.

“I just think China is the hardest country to live and travel in as a non-Chinese person, so I know that anything other than this will be so much easier, but I fear that I might find that boring,” she says.

“In China, I can challenge myself every day and I know that in another country, after a while, those challenges leave.”

Are you ready to buy a house? Take Smarter by CNBC Make It’s new online course How to Buy Your First Home. Expert instructors will help you weigh the cost of renting vs. buying, financially prepare, and confidently navigate every step of the process—from mortgage basics to closing the deal. Sign up today and use coupon code EARLYBIRD for an introductory discount of 30% off $97 (+taxes and fees) through July 15, 2025.

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