63-year-old CEO shares the top 3 red flags she sees in employees: ‘No one wants to be in their presence’
Deryl McKissack is no stranger to spotting toxic traits.
McKissack, 63, is the founder and CEO of Washington D.C.-based construction firm McKissack & McKissack, which she launched with $1,000 from her savings in 1990. She churned through employees who weren’t the right fit in her company’s early years and the business struggled, she says.
Finding the right talent helped grow her company, which now brings in $25 million per year in revenue, according to documents reviewed by CNBC Make It.
These three red flags stand out the most when McKissack is hiring employees or evaluating her current talent, she says.
People who lack integrity
Every boss needs to be able to trust their employees, McKissack says. People who lack integrity are a problem, especially managers who don’t give their teams proper credit.
Alarm bells go off in her head “if someone is saying ‘I did this’ the whole time, and they’re not giving credit to their team,” McKissack says.
McKissack isn’t the only person who says a lack of integrity is a red flag among employees: Heidi K. Gardner, a professional leadership advisor and distinguished fellow at Harvard Law School, similarly calls out workers who pass off other people’s work as their own. It’s unethical, and it gives off the impression that you don’t respect your colleagues, Gardner told Make It last year.
“Maybe they’re unable to actually see how much value the people around them bring to their own success,” she said. “And that inability to appreciate other people’s contributions is a huge red flag for me … It’s anti-collaborative.”
People who are hard to be around
Nearly every team, no matter your industry, needs people who can work well with others. That’s difficult when your co-workers don’t like being around you, or vice versa.
McKissack says she needs to actually like her employees’ personalities, because if she doesn’t like to be around you, chances are, clients won’t either. “If I don’t want to be in their presence, then no one wants to be in their presence, usually” she says.
Having a warm, inviting personality at work can potentially take you farther in your career than your capabilities and credentials, self-made millionaire and entrepreneur Steve Adcock told Make It in April.
“Your personality will get you 10 times richer than your intelligence,” said Adcock. “I learned that throughout my career, slowly but surely. I worked with a lot of smart people, no doubt about it. But those smartest people in the office weren’t necessarily the ones getting the raises and promotions.”
People who don’t live up to the company mantra
McKissack has a three-word mantra for her business: humble, hungry, smart. She says she picked it up from author and business management expert Patrick Lencioni’s book, “The Ideal Team Player.”
“We have an insatiable appetite for success,” McKissack wrote on LinkedIn earlier this year. “Humility drives us to make decisions for the collective good … [and] we value emotional intelligence because we know that’s what builds strong relationships.”
Expecting employees to embody those three descriptors — humble, hungry, smart — turned McKissack’s firm into a workforce full of people dedicated to the same mission, rather than one that struggled with low employee engagement, she says.
They’re the “three virtues” of successful team players, according to Lencioni’s book.
“I kept saying, ‘We’ve been stagnant for years. Why am I stagnant?’” says McKissack. “But when I made that decision to make our mission larger than just what we do, bricks and mortar, but make it more about the betterment of mankind, is when we really started changing.”
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I spent 18 months and $34,000 traveling, and felt more lost than ever—what I learned about happiness
In February 2024, I returned home to Los Angeles after the adventure of a lifetime: exploring 18 countries across South America and Asia in 18 months on a trip that cost me $34,000. I had quit my dream job as a video journalist to heal my burnout and find happiness beyond traditional measures of success and prestige.
When it was over, I went from chasing waterfalls in Indonesia and whizzing through the rolling green countryside of Vietnam on a motorbike to staring at my computer screen at home, watching the job rejections roll in.
In some ways, I felt more lost than ever.
I’d jumped back in the job market at a particularly tough moment, as thousands of journalists were getting laid off. The future of my career and income were uncertain. That’s a scary feeling at 34, when you often feel pressured to buy a house, have kids, and save up for retirement.
These circumstances would have made me unhappy and ashamed a few years ago. I no longer had the cool job or the epic, Instagrammable life around which my self-worth used to revolve. Instead, I was home and unemployed.
But my sabbatical taught me four key lessons about happiness that helped keep me positive, confident, and self-assured despite the challenges.
1. Happiness is not about extremes, but balance
For years, I thought working my dream job would bring me the ultimate happiness. But I couldn’t shake the burnout and anxiety.
Then I thought going all in on travel — the thing I’m most passionate about — would fulfill me. But eventually, the novelty wore off. Exhausted from constantly being on the go, I longed for the comfort and stability of home.
I realized that I won’t find lasting happiness unless I’m living a life balanced between adventure, rest, productivity, and learning.
Now that I’m home, I have new career and financial goals. A few years ago, I would’ve sacrificed everything to achieve those, while applauding myself as a go-getter and a hustler.
But now I pace myself and do my best to maintain a personal life and gym and meditation routine. I’m enjoying the journey instead of racing to a finish line that probably wouldn’t be everything I imagine it is.
2. Satisfaction is about perspective and gratitude
I never felt like I had enough success or money while living and working in Los Angeles and New York City. But in South America and Southeast Asia, where I encountered mind-boggling levels of poverty, I realized how privileged I am.
Even many average neighborhoods didn’t come close to my standard of comfort. A lot of the locals I met had never left their country because they couldn’t afford it.
I realized that I won’t find lasting happiness unless I’m living a life balanced between adventure, rest, productivity, and learning.
I realized that as an American renting an apartment in LA, I live an unfathomably luxurious life compared to much of the world.
While freelancing and job hunting in a very difficult market, I was tempted to slip back into feelings of inadequacy. But the perspective I gained while traveling reminded me that I already have — and am — more than enough.
3. Flexibility and quality of life matter more than a dream job
Before returning home, I spent nearly two months in Bali. I found true work-life balance and a magical, extravagant, free-spirited lifestyle I’d never experienced.
I began freelancing and applying for jobs from beautiful cafés and restaurants, while enjoying a slower pace of life, surrounded by lush nature and stunning views.
A few years ago, I felt like I needed a big brand-name employer to define my value. I would have despaired at the rejections and lack of opportunities. But my experience in Bali inspired me to value well-being over prestige and money. I saw what life could be like, and it had nothing to do with a dream job.
I decided to stop burning myself out trying to force my way back to a “perfect role.” Instead, I would pursue a job that offers flexibility and quality of life, while channeling my passion for video journalism into becoming a creator with my own YouTube channel.
I went from feeling helpless to empowered.
4. Real joy doesn’t come from a picture-perfect life
My sabbatical was partially inspired by the travel influencers I followed on Instagram. I was jealous — my life felt lame in comparison to the epic, picture-perfect lives they seemed to lead.
But behind the scenes, globetrotting is a lot messier. You don’t see the burnout, fatigue, loneliness, and sadness many travelers experience.
After realizing firsthand that nothing is as glamorous as it seems, I stopped aspiring to be like others and began to prioritize my own needs. I decided to sleep in and relax at cafés in Cartagena, for example, instead of hustling to embark on a Caribbean island boat tour I didn’t really want to take. I don’t regret it.
Nowadays, I spend most of my time working on my computer, going to the gym, running errands, and seeing friends and loved ones in low-key places. There’s barely any fodder for Instagram posts.
I see others leading more outwardly enviable lives, personally and professionally. I’m happy for them, but I don’t feel bad about myself. I know I’m exactly where I need to be — no matter what it looks like to anyone else.
Helen Zhao is a former video producer and writer at CNBC. Before joining CNBC as a news associate, she covered residential real estate for the LA Business Journal. She’s a California native and a proud USC Trojan and UCLA Bruin.
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An early retiree earning $380,000/year in passive income went back to work, but only lasted 4 months
Last year, after selling a chunk of his stock and bond portfolio to purchase a house in cash, Sam Dogen found himself with too little passive income to support his family’s budget.
The 47-year-old millionaire founder of Financial Samurai had been retired since 2012, but now that both of his kids would soon be attending school full-time, he decided to head back to work.
One of Dogen’s readers turned him on to a fintech startup in his local San Francisco. Everything seemed ideal. He’d be writing content about helping couples build wealth — right up his alley. He’d only have to work 20 hours a week in exchange for six-figure pay. They even let him maintain flexible hours. He started in November 2023.
He called it quits by March.
It turned out, this particular gig didn’t align with his personal or financial priorities at this point in his life. Though he thought working for a seed-stage startup would be exciting, it turned out to be chaotic. And while he was excited to create content on the firm’s behalf, he found the CEO’s editing style overbearing. Plus, the meetings, it seemed, were constant.
“It’s too bad, because it could have been a perfect fit,” Dogen says.
But there is one bright side to the false start: “The good thing about this, is that I realized what I don’t want.”
Here’s what he would have done differently.
The luxury of quitting
It’s worth nothing that not everyone has ability to up and quit a job they don’t like without something else lined up. Dogen would be the first to acknowledge that he’s in a unique situation financially.
By last year, his passive income portfolio, which includes stocks, bonds and real estate investments, among others, was bringing in about $380,000 a year. After selling income-producing investments to buy his dream home, Dogen estimates he had about a $100,000 hole in his budget to cover.
“I was feeling pretty anxious about it,” Dogen says. But a few things happened to alleviate the pressure.
Chiefly, he found renters for his previous home (which he had been planning to sell) who pay roughly $9,000 a month in rent. “That shored up a huge hole in my passive income,” Dogen says.
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He also finished writing and editing his second book, a feat that not only comes with an installment of his book deal money, but also the promise of passive income in the future.
Plus, he received a six-figure cash distribution from one of his real estate investments. That won’t produce passive income unless Dogen reinvests it, but it gave him the cash cushion to paper over some short-term cracks in his finances.
What Dogen’s looking for next
So why didn’t things work out for Dogen? One of the major gripes was managerial style. “One problem was too many meetings. If you’re a writer, when you’re in meetings, you’re not working,” he says. “And it was really hard for me to adapt to too much management.”
Dogen, who runs a successful financial blog, describes getting rounds and rounds of edits on everything he submitted. “It was totally demoralizing,” he says.
Plus, he says, with his younger child slated to start full-time school in the fall, it was tougher than he expected being away from the kids.
“Because I’ve been a stay-at-home dad since they both were born, I thought I would find it easier to break away and go to the office and not spend time with them, because I need that reprieve — something different to do,” he says. “It was the exact opposite.”
Dogen plans to re-enter the workforce once both his kids are in school full time this fall. Here are three things he plans to do when searching for his next gig.
1. Set boundaries
While it’s difficult to know how a manager operates before you start working at a company, you can negotiate some ground rules before accepting an offer, Dogen says.
“I’ve learned that I’m going to set clear boundaries and expectations up front before I take that offer, and just say like, ‘Monday, Wednesday, Friday: these are my days, it’s 20 hours,’” he says. “Maybe I’ll do time limits for work, or I’ll do it by project base.”
2. Find the right company culture
In hindsight, Dogen realizes that returning to work at a seed-stage startup was likely biting off more than he was willing to chew. “It means total hectic chaos,” he says.
Dogen says he may look for his next gig at a later-stage startup or even a mature company — even if the latter doesn’t feel trendy among the San Francisco tech crowd.
“Everyone makes fun of people who work at [big-name tech companies], because they only work 20 or 30 hours and get paid tons of money,” Dogen says. “I mean, that sounds pretty good to me.”
3. Prioritize his kids
Still, locking down a high-paying tech job wouldn’t solve the problem of being away from his kids. To that end, Dogen is considering whether money is the most important factor in his next gig.
“I think maybe a more fulfilling job role is completely out of startup, tech and AI, but instead, in education — specifically, an educational role where I’m working at my children’s school,” Dogen says. “That way I can be part of a community and get paid. And see my children during the day every once in a while.”
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The 10 worst states to retire in the U.S.—No. 1 isn’t California or New York
While the best state to retire in the U.S. is also one of the smallest in the country, the worst state to retire is the largest.
Alaska ranks as the worst state in the U.S. to retire for the third year in a row, according to Bankrate’s study of the best states to retire in 2024.
To compile its list of the best and worst places to retire in the U.S., Bankrate ranked all 50 states across five weighted categories:
- Affordability (40%): Analyzes factors such as local and state sales taxes, cost of living and average annual property taxes
- Overall wellbeing (25%): Includes factors such as the number of adults over 62 per 100,000 residents and access to food and health care
- Quality and cost of health care (20%): Looks at factors such as the cost of health care at the state level and the performance of each state’s health system
- Weather (10%): Evaluates data on factors such as a state’s average annual temperature and average number of tornado strikes, earthquakes and hurricane landfalls
- Crime (5%): Examines factors such as the amount of property crimes and violent crimes per 100,000 residents
Bankrate analyzed datasets from a number of sources, including the Council for Community and Economic Research, the U.S. Census Bureau, the Tax Foundation and the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration.
Here are the 10 worst states to retire, according to Bankrate.
Notably, Alaska ranks last in the weather category. Although temperatures in Alaska can range from 45 degrees to 75 degrees Fahrenheit in the summer, they can sink as low as negative 10 degrees Fahrenheit in the winter.
Alaska can be an expensive place to live, especially for retirees with a fixed income. On average, the cost of living in Alaska is about 30% higher than the rest of the country, according to RentCafe. Housing costs are about 17% higher than the national average, and utilities and health-care expenses are both nearly 50% higher.
On the upside, Alaska can be a very tax-friendly location for retirees. The state doesn’t have income tax, estate taxes or inheritance taxes and doesn’t tax pension payments or retirement benefits from Social Security.
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Lack of affordability appears to be a common thread among the other low-ranking states on the list, which include New York, Washington and California — all known for being relatively pricey.
However, just because a state has a higher cost of living doesn’t necessarily mean you should write it off as a potential retirement destination. You may just need to plan to set aside more money for retirement than you would if you were planning to retire somewhere less expensive.
CNBC Make It’s retirement calculator can help you estimate how much you’ll need to save for retirement based on factors like your current age, savings, income and when you’d like to stop working.
And while living costs can be a key determinant in deciding where you may want to retire in the future, it’s also good to keep other non-financial aspects in mind. For example, access to social and community-building activities is an important, but often overlooked, consideration for retirees, according to Bankrate.
“Having that sense of community and human connection is huge to healthy aging,” Kerry Hannon, a retirement expert and Author of “In Control at 50+: How to Succeed in the New World of Work,” says in Bankrate’s study.
“Isolation and loneliness are not something you want to move toward, so look for your community,” she says.
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High performers at work get the worst feedback, and it’s driving them to quit
High-performers and women aren’t getting quality feedback in the workplace, and it could be driving them to quit.
That’s according to a new analysis of more than 23,000 performance reviews across 250 U.S. workplaces from Textio, an AI-powered writing platform for HR teams.
Quality of feedback is different from whether it’s positive or negative in nature. High-quality feedback comes with clear examples of the employee’s contributions and clear suggestions for improvement and how to make progress on professional goals, like getting a promotion.
On the flip side, low-quality feedback isn’t specific, relevant or actionable. “It could be the feedback is about somebody’s personality rather than their work, or it could be exaggerated and not super realistic,” says Kieran Snyder, co-founder and chief scientist emeritus at Textio.
When people get low-quality feedback — even when it’s positive — they’re 63% more likely to quit within the next 12 months, according to a separate 2023 Textio survey.
That could spell trouble for teams with star employees. “As people are providing feedback for these high performers, they feel the need to provide more, but it is more often surface-level,” Snyder tells CNBC Make It.
Meanwhile, 30% of high performers leave their organization within their first year, according to Textio data.
Women get more personality-based feedback and internalize negative reviews
The Textio analysis also finds that there are gendered biases in what kind of feedback is delivered to men, women and nonbinary employees.
Women are more likely than men to be given feedback based on personality traits, whether they’re collaborative and helpful, and generally “how they make people feel,” Snyder says, while men’s performance reviews spend more time praising them for being ambitious and confident. Even the highest-performing women are subject to this “personality tax,” according to the report.
These comments may be positive on the surface level, Snyder says, but fail to measure women’s performance on the work they actually accomplish: “This feedback is focused on personality rather than somebody’s real work deliverables.”
There are also gendered differences in the feedback that people internalize, which can reinforce social stereotypes in a work setting and can impact performance and career advancement.
For example, when asked about how they were described in a recent performance review, 71% of men recalled being described as likable, compared with only 19% of women and 11% of nonbinary people.
Women and nonbinary employees were more likely to internalize negatively stereotyped feedback, such as being described as emotional, unlikable or difficult.
“Women are much more likely to be described by personality traits,” Snyder says, “and within that, the personality traits that are used to describe women tend to be much more negative, and even within that, women are much more likely to remember the negative feedback than the men are.”
“The mind-performance connection is real,” she adds, “and you can see that play out over time in things like disparate promotion rates, pay raise rates and so on.”
What bosses and workers can do
It’s crucial to recognize that these biases run deep, and even the most well-intentioned managers could use more training around how to deliver high-quality performance feedback without treading in gender or racial stereotypes, Snyder says.
For example, businesses could use software to provide managers with real-time feedback on the quality of their employee reviews as they write them, Snyder says. These systems can flag when the language in the reviews relies too heavily on personality-based traits.
Cross-functional reviews, where leaders from across the team help contribute to the assessment of an employee’s performance, can help too.
“Managers sit in people-calibration meetings with one another in most organizations at review time,” Snyder says, “and I think managers can be a good check and balance with respect to one another.”
The responsibility for delivering high-quality feedback should sit with bosses and HR teams, she adds, but employees can also advocate for themselves if they’re not getting it.
“It’s always well-placed advice to ask for the feedback you’re not receiving,” Snyder says.
From the report, employees said they were satisfied with high-quality feedback that gave them “a good understanding of the skills my manager expects me to demonstrate in order to earn my next promotion.” But beyond working toward a promotion, Snyder says to ask for specific feedback that will allow you to “keep learning, developing, growing and getting greater opportunities.”
Make the specific request to your manager in advance, Snyder says. For example, you could pose: “Next week in our one-on-one, I’d like to have a conversation where we can talk about some of the specific examples of work I’ve done and, if I were performing at the next level, what I might be doing a little differently.”
Executive teams, HR leaders and managers should take note when employees, especially high performers, raise the issue of getting constructive feedback that can help them grow professionally, Snyder says: “It has real impact for employee retention and attrition if you get it wrong.”
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